"I hadn't the heart to touch my breakfast. I told Jeeves to drink it himself."

-My Man Jeeves

"A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle."

-The Man Upstairs and Other Stories

"The Right Hon. was a tubby little chap who looked like he had been poured into his clothes and had forgotten to say when."

-Carry on, Jeeves

"The voice of love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number."

-Very Good, Jeeves

"I pressed down the mental accelerator. The old lemon throbbed fiercely. I got an idea."

-Carry on, Jeeves

"Intoxicated? The word did not express it by a mile. He was oiled, boiled, fried, plastered, whiffled, sozzled, and blotto."

-Meet Mr. Mulliner

"She fitted into my biggest arm-chair as if it had been built round her by someone who knew they were wearing arm-chairs tight about the hips that season."

-Carry on, Jeeves

"Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror."

-Right Ho, Jeeves

"Good Lord, Jeeves! Is there anything you don't know?"
"I couldn't say, sir."

-The Inimitable Jeeves